Goodness Weekly 7.29.2024
“Grace means that all of your mistakes now serve a purpose instead of serving shame.”
–Brené Brown
What’s Good
Sustainability in community is a tenant we hold very dear here at Sunset Ridge Collective. Making something new out of something old, in the company of partners, neighbors, and friends; brings us so much joy.
If you follow us on Instagram, you will see that we have quite a few items for sale. As we make room for new tenants through office spaces available for rent upstairs, we find ourselves with quite a bit of furniture that we’d love for neighbors to be able to upcycle.
Please email Nancy to purchase or organize pickup.
We announced a few weeks ago that Compost Queens is now Mission Compost. This is your reminder that Sunset Ridge Collective is a drop location for your weekly compost pick up.
Grace for Shame
Message From Taylor Bates, Deputy Director, Sunset Ridge Collective
I’m going to tell a story about poop, which is probably the first time anyone has done that in Goodness Weekly. My husband and I have two toddlers so there is a lot of talking about poop in our house.
Recently I went out of town on a girls trip with our 2-year-old daughter and when I came home to do laundry from the trip I opened our dryer, which I thought was full of freshly laundered clothing that my husband had done, I was immediately hit by the overwhelming scent of hot poop—I know, gross!!
This was a FULL load of laundry—like all of my husband’s and son’s clothes from the prior week. There was dried poo smeared on the inside of the dryer drum and over many of the items of clothing. Out of bewilderment I called out to my husband—“Hunter, what happened in the dryer???” He ran upstairs and may have used an expletive that rhymes with “Oh, quit!”.
Now I know this newsletter is all about goodness so I promise I’m getting to something good…
Hunter began to trace back the last few hours of the afternoon, realizing that there was a moment when JoJo had come downstairs pants-less letting him know that he had successfully gone potty on his own but needed clean clothes. To his credit, our toddler had correctly put his dirty clothes in the hamper, but to our detriment they were soiled with poo, which he was trying to hide from his father. Hunter proceeded to do the laundry, unknowingly throwing the poo into the washing machine, and then into the dryer.
We both went to bed that evening, abandoning the laundry machine disaster, and leaving the clean up to the following day. I spent six hours of my Sunday Googling “how to clean poop out of a washer and dryer”, buying cleaning supplies and heavy duty laundry detergent, running three cleaning cycles on the washing machine, washing the soiled clothes three more times, soaking them in a vinegar bath, and scrubbing the inside of the dryer and the lint trap.
I came into the office the next day and Jess and I laughed about this absurdity, because that’s how parents cope. She suggested this story is a great analogy for shame and what happens when we try to hide it or keep it in the dark–it can make your problem so much more difficult to handle. I realize this is a crude metaphor but if JoJo would have told Hunter about his accident when it first happened, the clean up would’ve been much easier, to say the least.
Author and researcher Brené Brown who studies courage, vulnerability, shame, and empathy says, “If you put shame in a petri dish, it needs three ingredients to grow exponentially: secrecy, silence, and judgment. If you put the same amount of shame in the petri dish and douse it with empathy, it can’t survive.”
Shame doesn’t serve any good purpose. And hiding our shame only makes it a bigger mess.
Four key elements of shame resilience according to Brené are:
Recognizing, naming, and understanding your shame triggers
Identifying external factors that led to the feelings of shame
Connecting with others to receive and offer empathy
Speaking about your feelings of shame with others who you feel safe with
I encourage you this week to consider how you might explore these practices to strengthen your shame resilience in your own daily life.
Wednesdays Mission Compost pick up
Tuesday, August 6th, Storytime on the Lawn
Saturday, August 10th, Second Saturday
Saturday, August 24th, Betty’s Co. Pop Up
Saturday, August 24th, Urban Tree Company Workshop
Lunchtime Yoga Flow with NYX Wellness, Mon-Fri at 12pm, upstairs in Room 200
Sign up for your class here.
For weekly hours of One Another Coffee, Scott’s Pizza, and NYX Yoga, please feel free to check our calendar and follow us on Instagram for any updates.
Back to School with Camelot Elementary
Our friends over at Camelot Elementary are in need of some help as the school year begins. As you know, we partner with Camelot to provide Snack Paks for children who struggle with food insecurity, affordable Christmas gifts for Camelot families, teacher appreciation, and more throughout the school year. Camelot’s Family Specialist Landy has asked for the following help:
“Next year, the community partner that has traditionally provided us with brand-new uniforms will now only be able to supply polos. As a result, we are seeking additional support to meet our needs. The Amazon wish list has only uniforms listed, and the Target wish list has uniforms and school supplies listed. We gratefully welcome and appreciate any contributions, even if they are not listed on the wish lists.
Thank you so much for all your support and everything you do for our school.”
Inhale:
I move my feelings of shame
Exhale:
from the darkness into the light.
